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Jess Gatsby

tell me a story

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writing

Monday Morning.

I  was sitting on my bed, waiting for the message that would signal what my tasks were for the day. My wife lay behind me, still sleeping. She was snoring softly, something she is embarrassed by, but I find it cute.

The sun had not risen yet, but the morning was already warm and sticky. People think living here is a vacation, but most days it is like you are walking through soup. Hot and wet.

I was still waiting when I heard her stir behind me. I felt arms wrap around my waist, and her cheek pressed against my back.

“Has he told you where you are going today?” She asked in a groggy voice.

“Not yet, I am still waiting.”

“Oh, he is such a dick.” She said, kissing the middle of my back. Such a way with words.

My phone buzzed in my hands. It was him.

“Finally.” She said. “Where are you off to today?”

I read the message.

“Fuck.” I started. “I’m not sure.”

The messages were always so vague.

 

Jess Gatsby

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To my ex-

If the words flowed so

easily from me, the way

they wrap around you

and your anger, then I

would be able to tell

you all the things we lost.

I thought when we left

then it would be over,

but still I find weekly

that our paths are crossed.

I hoped that you would put

action to the words,

that seemed so real coming

from your lips that day.

People don’t understand

that friendships are another

breakup that can leave

you feeling this way.

Jess Gatsby

My ebook

Somewhere Out There

Hello my lovely followers. I wrote a book.

Sort of…

This is a collection of some of my short stories and poems. If you do purchase the book, thank you in advance. The profits will be helping me pay for my masters program, so if you do like my writing and want to support me this is the way to do it!

 

THANK YOU!

Jess Gatsby

I sit here worried for you.

 

I think the people that know you

have not seen a difference, but

I do.

I don’t think that you

see a difference, but

I do.

I don’t think you

are taking this seriously, but

I do.

 

Every day is a day of joy with

you and I

watch as you get

worse.

Right now it is slowly. But

what will

I do

when it isn’t

Slowly,

Slowly,

Slowly,

Anymore?

 

The most fragile thing I own is my heart, and it is filled with you.

 

What am I going to do?

 

JG

A study of emotion

She sat down at her desk and wondered what she was doing. The day had taken an unexpected turn and here she found herself longing.

In the candlelight she could see a glimmer of the mirror in the corner.

Was that his face?

She kept seeing him.

Ella knew that he had been gone for a long time, but she still saw him.

Her hands reached out in the darkness, over the candle she felt the warmth.

Is this all she would have now?

The heat of his gaze in the corner of her eye, and then…

cold…

dark…

She felt the loneliness surround her like a mist that tickled her skin and made bumps raise on her arms.

Again a glimpse of light in the mirror.

Amber eyes from the light of the flame,

and again he was gone.

 

Jess Gatsby

 

 

Hello Old Friend.

I saw a photo of you today,

one where you smiled and it was

lovely, lovely, lovely.

I wonder sometimes how

you can hide that smile

away. away. away.

Jess Gatsby

Distractions are safer.

It was the day I had been waiting for. All week, it has been so long and I have been waiting for this minute to see him and yet…

I find myself disappointed. This moment is a meager one, compared to what I was expecting. Expecting, expecting. Life should be more than that… and she is more… is she more…

She couldn’t help but wonder what it would be like if she were to be noticed. He felt like he was running in circles around her, as to not offend. They both ignore each other like they couldn’t be bothered- like another has their fancy. If they would talk, if they could speak up, they would know. She wishes this were true, and he does too.

 

A cute little sad love story.

Maybe based off of something else?

You will never know.

-JG.

12. 22. 17

Ah.  Yes.

The expression I wish to sigh, but then I will never.

Love and…

I can’t find the right explanation for the feeling. Oh.

yes.

Well when I see you, the look on your face tells me the same thing.

The look on your face,

your eyes,

your…

tell me sir, do you think that you hold the answer or that I do? For I am waiting

 

JG.

12.17.17

A free sort of Dream. . .

I woke on the shore bank. I felt something tight in my arms and legs, something not the same as it was before. My body felt tense, I could feel the rocks underneath my back and the waves lap against my skin. The spray from the water was getting in my eyes and nose.

None of these sensations bothered me.

I felt one with the spot where I lay, like I could stay that way forever looking at the sky lit with purple and blue of the approaching night. In the corner of my eye, I made out the moon. Not full yet- it had risen too early for that, but I still enjoyed the sight.

Enjoy.

I was trying to figure out that emotion. My body was all I could feel and then I felt a spark of something else. I figured I should stir from my spot. The waves did not fully engulf me, so I was laying quite exposed to the elements and to any passerby. These thoughts flooded my mind as suddenly the spray from the waters no longer felt comforting. I did not know why I was laying the way I was there. I felt something strange. Something strong.

Panic.

I jolted up, looking around to make sure I was alone. I didn’t feel the presence of any other person, but that bothered me as well. I saw I was in some sort of small section of coast line. The ocean stretched vast in front of me, but most of the coast was characterized by rocks and cliff sides. I looked behind me and saw trees and forest and nothing else. The calm that had embraced my waking had long vanished and I looked back to the moon. It would be night soon and I would be here in the dark on the coast of…

Non.

I would find a way out of here. I looked down at myself, my arms and legs.

“C’est impossible.” I whispered to the coming night.

The scars and marks and disfiguration of my childhood were gone, and in place was clean and smooth skin, free of imperfections. The muscles were formed correctly around the bones, there were no indentations or spots or …

How did I become this way? How did I come to this spot?

I rose slowly, but there was no pain. I could move freely, my arms swung high about my head and I jumped into the air. There was no resistance from my body.

I was free.

 

JG.

12.15.17.

 

Hey guys. I know it has been awhile but much has been happening. I will do an update post soon. This is a dream I had.

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